If These Pages Could Talk
by Shining Star Suguru-chan
Summary: My name is Suguru Fujisaki and life has been rough. Upon falling in love with a guitarist, I can't seem to get the words out to tell him how I feel. But, What if Tohma finds out of this affair to be? All my thoughts shrouded within my diary.
1. Chapter 1

Hey All, this is Shiningstar Suguru-chan! Time to make a fan fiction comeback! Well this will be different from the comedy fics I usually do, so please bear with me! Yes, you will notice a repeated theme of the title throughout this story so yeah, I did that on purpose. Now to give you a few hints: The story is written in Suguru's point of view. The italics represent the entries of Suguru's diary.

**Disclaimer: **I do not own this the characters or any aspect of Gravitation, though I wish I did! T.T

"**If Only These Pages Could Talk …"**

"My name is Suguru Fujisaki; yes the cousin of the ever so successful Tohma Seguchi. I lived a life in his shadow for all of my sixteen years. I play keyboards same as him. Moreover, everyone says I am just like him, even down to the innocent smile. But, now it is my time to surpass Tohma Seguchi. As Suguru Fujisaki. If only I could break out of this emotional shell and come to terms with my heart. To tell _him_. If only these pages could talk …"

**March 21st **

_The first day of spring, the time of love._

_Everyone seems so happy and glee …_

_Except me._

Another busy day at NG corporations. It seemed to fly by so fast, with just Mr. Nakano and me. A little too fast. I wished time had flowed much slower, better yet, stand still. To keep his deep gaze beaming upon my lonely frame. If only these pages could talk …

_Listening to the melody, mingle into a masterpiece._

_I one day hope, like our music-_

_Our hearts will sync …_

_Like harmony._

Those thoughts ran through my mind as I prepared to make my leave. I blush lightly, knowing his eyes were still on me. The flushing red color waned as I continued to walk. If only these pages could talk …

_Traveling at a steady pace_

_Left foot, right foot_

_My heart behinds to race, why?_

_I may not why, but I am too afraid to look._

It seemed Mr. Nakano was I on my route home. However, he could not possibly know how I feel. I had not showed him any signs! So why? WHY?

"You dropped your notebook." He said.

I looked at him a bit dumbfounded and grinned my usual Tohma symmetrical smile. My eyes looked deep within his. I knew what I wanted. Hiroshi Nakano, one hundred percent.

_Am I standing still?_

_Caught in a lovely thrill._

_I cannot explain_

_The way I feel._

_Am I standing still?_

_Lost in this trill._

_Wishing most for_

_My dreams to be fulfilled?_

If only I could speak to him, the words fear to say most. Even hearing his name sends shivers to my spine. What would Mr. Shindou do? Just be dynamic as he is with Mr. Yuki? No, it is not my style. Should I sink as low as Mr. Uesugi? To stalk and grow my love into a dark lust as he did for Mr. Sakuma? No! Do not even consider the thought. You are too good for that. Then shall I act in the accord of cousin Tohma? To be straightforward at all times? I should but I am much too shy. If only there were a way to just link my emotions straight through to his heart. If only these pages could talk …

_Listening to the wind_

_Silhouetting_ _in the dark_.

_Will one day, the light of Hiroshi's love_

_Reach my heart?_

The walk home too seemed to go by rather quickly. Perhaps, it is just because I am lonely, forever waiting for that special lover. The feeling must be very sweet, having the opportunity to be in the arms of the person who swept you off your feet. However, I disagree with the concept; many times, I wished I had the courage to stalk. However, I stop. If only these pages were able to talk …

_Someone, please free me_

_Of this desolating misery._

_Therefore, I can tell him what I feel most to be seen._

The day soon turned to dusk. Yet another day I live with my goal unachieved. Often times I wished of death. Just free of this grief. Most days I feel as if all is lost. If only these pages could talk, then he would hear my testimony and send a reply. Nevertheless, if this is the case, why is it that I continue to cry?

_The tears flow like blood_

_To ease up the pain_

_But, none will seem to allay_

_What is now branded in the heart and brain?_

Approaching my doorstep. Turning the key. Unlatching the lock and entering territory. It all seemed so empty without you by my side. I remained strong, honest I have tried. However, why do these tears keep passing by and by? For what reason is it that I cannot cease to cry?

**Chapter 1 - END**

Okay, that was chapter one of my story! I hope you liked it and yes, I think Suguru and Hiroshi make a cute couple! Please review and tell me what you think.


	2. The Not so Uninvited Guest

Okay, this is chapter two coming up … This chapter is a bit longer than the other, so yeah I guess that's a good thing

**Disclaimer:** yeah, I do not own any aspect of Gravitation. Maki Murakami does, the genius. But I wish to adopt my little Suguru, though TT

"**If These Pages Could Talk …" Chapter 2- The Not so Uninvited Guest**

**March 22**

I jumped out of my bed in excitement to the phone call I had received this morning. I'm not usually a morning person but, this was the mother of all exceptions. Mr. Nakano was having his apartment painted and needs a place to stay. With occasional reasoning with my parents, I am sure to have my victory. Father disagreed, of course. My mother, on the other hand always favored Mr. Nakano. He was what she saw as a impacting influence. Well, when all else fails, my mother has great tastes.

_Keeping my thoughts hidden under_

_A delicate porcelain mask._

_Try not to be too direct_

_Or else my heart may crack. _

My grin soon waxed to that of a smile. At last, after all of my patient waiting I get an opportunity to get close to the godly radiant Mr. Nakano. I made sure the house was in the best of condition, while a drastically wagered a game play. My mind on the game and his heart was the prize.

_By and By, _

_I continue to try …_

Gazing at my reflection in the mirror washing all the sleep away, I noticed a few tears running down the rims of my eyes. I was always taught to be truthful to myself, by my parents and cousin Tohma. But, I have an ominous feeling about it all, especially it Tohma were to find out of it. Is it a bad thing to love him?

_My oh my,_

_Again I cry …_

Out of stupidity, a laugh passes through my lips. It was so funny how I thought obsessing over a person to the point of tears was redundant. Yet, here I stand crying. What would he think of me? Can his soul reach through this barrier of reluctance?

_Try to be brave,_

_And the reward may be greater than life._

Alas, a knocking came upon my door. Quickly running down the stairs pushing my mother and father aside, who then thought I was a bit crazy, I opened the door to see my Hiroshi standing before me. My Hiroshi? Oh boy, I'm getting too confident. Before me he stood, wearing a black jacket with matching black jeans and a white tee. I didn't realize at that point I was blushing. When he came to touch my face in concern of the flushing color, the mood was then broken by "Mother dearest."

"Suguru! Oh dear, you are so red. Do you have a fever?" She asked.

Oh thanks a whole lot, mother. Just when I had him right where I wanted him. God, I need to move out.

"I am fine, mother." I exclaimed, hiding the pisses mood I was in of the whole thing.

Hiroshi smiled and greeted my mother. Ah, Hiroshi. I may get used to using his name. What can I say? It just felt so good.

_Lovely admiration_

_Beyond your gift of guitar_

_Our music would blend_

_Yet, I love you from afar. _

Before I knew what was going on, mother was dragging me to my bedroom, implying that I was ill. I yelped, kicked and punched in acts of rebellion. My attempts were in vain as father too, forced me to obey. NO! He was right THERE! So close yet, so very far.

Laying in my bed, for some reason the tears wouldn't stop. Perhaps, I was scared. Scared of how far I may go, in my own home, no less. Hearing my door creak open, my eyes directed the dazzling frame of Hiroshi who stood beneath the threshold.

"Suguru." He called out in a voice that nearly made me melt.

Quickly wiping the glossy tears from my face and forcing a warm smile on, I sat up and looked towards him. God only knows how much troubles I hide behind this smile.

"Yes, … Mr. Nakano?" I choked.

Stupid, Stupid, STUPID! Why do you sound so scared? I usually keep my cool around him at rehearsals. But he's just so … attractive. How could I not be nervous?

_There you stood in front_

_With concern on your face._

_At most, I really hoped_

_Our thoughts could relate._

He walked over and sat at the edge of my bed. I trembled slightly before regaining my composure. Blinking, he set his hand on mine.

"Are you not well?" he smiled softly.

"What makes you come upon that thought?" I replied.

"Well, it's only 5:15 and you are already in your bed." He examined me for a moment and gave a smirk. "In adorable pajamas, no less."

OOH! Him and his wisecracks! Although I hated them, as long as they came form his mouth, I adored them so.

_His eyes stare into mine_

_This feeling was so great._

_If only time would stop_

_This memory wouldn't fade._

I laughed somewhat at his comment and gave him a look. I could tell he had something on his mind. But, I'm too afraid to ask.

"Suguru?" His voice spoke to me again.

"Y-yes?" I yelped. Again I panic. This MUST stop!

"It's still early, how about we go out to catch a movie or something?"

"A movie."

"Yes, a movie. Don't tell me you are going deaf too. You have to stop hanging around Shuichi." He joked.

At that, I jumped out of my bed and stripped down to my underwear and T-shirt. Oh My God! I'm stripping in front of Hiroshi! I blushed, grabbed my clothes and dashed to the bathroom.

Wiping my face in the running water, I scolded myself. '_How could you do such a thing? How could you be so careless?' _I thought as I placed on my green sweater with beige khaki pants. I couldn't tell what was going on behind closed doors but, I certainly hope he liked what he saw. Even if it was the smallest bit of admiration. '_Don't think like that!' _I again scolded myself. At times, though many may not believe it, I can be somewhat of a pervert.

_Love makes you do _

_Things you may regret-_

_As long as it works out_

_To be dynamic._

I smiled and opened the door once again confronting Hiroshi. He smiled along with me as he laid a hand out, embracing my own, escorting me out of the door. I had a feeling this could be a real date if I just played my cards right. Try to keep my cool. And stop being so SHY! Little did I know he saw me from the corner of his eye.

"You look so adorable." He teased. "Like a child on their first day of pre-school."

He said I was "adorable!" I could only blush a bit more. Hey, wait a minute! Per-school? There he goes again challenging my sugar coated look. Not that it's a problem to me.

_We are staring face to face_

_Closely we would walk._

_I may not even regret_

_If the pages of this diary could talk … _

**Chapter 2- END**

That was chapter two! I hope you liked it. Well please review and tell me what you think.


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